Pimping and prostitution at Harrogate #TOPCrime2013
I was at the Theakstons Old Peculiar Crime Writing Festival in Harrogate these last four days, a mix of author panels, crime talk, food, drink and meeting up with pals.
The thing about this Festival, and everybody will tell you so, is just how friendly and positive everyone is. This year was no exception.
Everyone was as perky and cheery as ever, apart from one bloke I found myself sitting across from at lunch one day. He leaned forward, puffed out his chest and announced he had sold 60 copies of his ebook on Amazon and that “ALL AGENTS AND PUBLISHERS ARE FUCKING BASTARDS!” He bellowed his opinion so bloody loudly I’m sure if you’re reading this in the Highlands of Scotland or indeed Penzance you’ll have heard the blighter’s opinion too. This was on the first day of the Festival so here’s hoping some of the Harrogate vibe rubbed off on him over the next three days at some point.
Speaking of lunch, The Old Swan Hotel where the Festival takes place, serves not only delicious lunches but has a fine line in desserts too. It would be just plain mean of me to keep the memory of such delights to myself, so:
If you’re on Twitter and someone re-tweets/RTs a tweet you’ve written, I’m sure like me you tweet back with something akin to “thanky muchly for the RT you’re star you are, gawd bless ya” in gratitude and doff your cap, albeit virtually.
I learned at one Harrogate panel that RTing someone else is “pimping”. What we really need to say is “thank you for being my pimp”. I’m not quite sure how well this will go down (so to speak) but I’ll be giving it a try as rules are there to be followed, are they not?
Also, rampant self-promotion on social media is prostitution, which seems to me a bit strong but ok, I’ll take that on board too. Honestly, the things you learn in middle class Yorkshire. You really wouldn’t think, would you?
BLATANT PROTITUTION ALERT: Read the first chapter of my crime novel Black Milk plus synopsis here